Wednesday, August 5, 2009
This is another stream of consciousness, clouded by the liquor and the emotions of the moment. I don't write well, but this seems like it could be a good idea. I like where I am, sort of. I only truly like one person around me but I really like learning and experiencing the shit I'm involved with. I hate everyone. I love my family. I hate everyone else. Except Dj and now Alex. But maybe i'll hate them too when I find out what they don't tell me. I can't afford to like anyone else. My girlfriends, my friends, my extended family even, could all be snakes in the grass (and, most, at one time or another have been). I don't like people that don't reciprocate a liking for me. I have a weakness that involves me loaning money or being kind and it never plays out as I think it will; not to say that I am perfect, or that I have lived up to my promises in the past. I do believe though, that if I take a large debt or if I see a large problem I step the fuck back and pay my dues. Then again, I watched a guy die yesterday and I didn't help at all, so maybe I am a larger d-bag then I perceive myself to be.